Right now, I am in the midst of one of the biggest transitions of my life thus far. I am experiencing a lot of change (which I'm not generally too keen of). This change, though, is different. This change is messing with my sense of identity. I have been a student of social work for the last 5 years (4 years of undergrad, 1 year of grad school). As happy as I am to no longer be a student (and seeking employment!), I was comfortable in the role of a student. I was good at that role.
On top of my role change, my wonderful man (who we'll call "J") and I left the state of North Carolina and moved back to our home state of New Jersey. When I first moved to North Carolina, I was not impressed...at all. The bugs were unnaturally huge, the humidity was insane, and the rain was unlike any rain I have ever experienced before. Also, I moved there alone, while J was deployed overseas. So, on top of being in an entirely new place, I was also incredibly lonely and ready to lose my mind after nearly 9 months of deployment. Long story short, I welcomed J home (best day EVER!) about a month after I moved to North Carolina (10 long months of deployment over!) and ended up loving my new home. I created my own little family there, between my MSW girls and my Marine Corps family. I became a part of something wonderful and loved being a member of that group. I felt comfortable, loved, and taken care of. I was happy.
Now, J and I were both very aware of his contract in the Marine Corps ending right around the time I would be graduating with my Master's of Social Work. For the past 4.5 years, I always thought that I would be thrilled when J's contract ended. Now, however, as it is ending, I am incredibly emotional about it. I used to view the Marine Corps as something that kept J away from, due to years of a long distance relationship, deployment trainings, DETs, and deployments. However, when I moved to North Carolina and was immersed in the Marine Corps lifestyle, I began to see all of the good things about it, and I grew to love it. Now, J is on terminal leave and in the process of transitioning back into civilian life, and I am grieving the loss of my life in North Carolina. I never expected I would miss this lifestyle so much, but now that the time to leave it is here, I miss it terribly.
That is a lot of change, all happening at one time. J's leaving the Marine Corps, I am no longer a student, and we are back in our home state, which doesn't quite feel so much like home anymore. I have had my fair share of breakdowns and spouts of, "Lets go back!". However, I am also starting (slowly, but surely) to embrace this new life. J will be starting school in September (thanks to the G.I. Bill!) and I am job hunting like crazy (I've had 2 interviews so far that I feel good about)! Instead of being miserable, I am making a conscious effort to be positive about this life transition. Some days are harder than others, but I keep telling myself that a few months from now, I will most likely be thrilled about this new adventure we are on. And most importantly, J and I are in this together. As long as we've got each other, we'll be happy.
Have any of you experienced big life changes? What did you do to cope?
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